The Two Pearls of Wisdom - Alison Goodman

"...the truth can be  deadly..."

I've discovered I have a type. I think we all do. I've known for a long time that my favourite is fantasy, but I realised that I specifically like fantasy with strong female leads. I will read others of course, but I am instinctively drawn towards feisty beautiful female characters with magical abilities and a penchance for a dashing price.

I think this is where I went astray. Instead of being instinctively drawn to this book, I was seeking it out. As I sat cross legged on the floor of the second-hand book shop, classical music playing soothingly in the background, I picked up book after book looking for female leads. The premise of The Two Pearls of Wisdom fascinated me and I like to support Australian authors.

Sadly, the book felt somewhat amateur and it didn't end, meaning I have to purchase the next book in the series. Which I will, of course, not because I truly want to follow the characters on their journey, but because that is where I will find the ending of the first book.

However, it was a pleasant and easy read. I wanted a light fluffy read and I got more than I bargained for. Maybe I am being too harsh on the poor book, seeing as it follows The Time Traveler's Wife which unceremoniously ripped out my heart...

The little feminist within me rallied with Eon/Eona, I desperately wanted her to succeed. Her struggle with her womanhood in a male dominated society and the need to conform, to hide her true self as something shameful both insulted me (as a feminist) and compelled me to commend her strength. 

     He grunted. "You have the courage of a warrior."
     "No," I said flatly. "I don't. " 
     "Are you frightened now?"
     I nodded, shame flushing my skin.
     "Is it going to stop you?"
     "No. "
     "That is the courage of a warrior."

Also there was magic and dragons and shit. I love that.

A poem

I wrote a poem. It's not a very good poem. 

And it's a poem of the non-rhyming variety.

I felt the need to post it, a bit of release, a bit of letting go, per say. To preface my poem, I parted ways with someone I had loved for many, many years and the resulting breaking of heart was almost more than I could bear. It was the first time in my life feeling these feelings that many have felt before me, and many will feel after me, and I will no doubt feel again - but having felt them for the first time, I was entirely blindsided by the experience.

If my poem - for just one person - allows them to think, "You have put my feelings into words," then I will be supremely happy. I have left it largely unedited (it could easily do with a working over) but I don't want to mess with the raw feeling of when I initially wrote it back in May.

Hope it makes you feel something.

A feeling
manifested as physical pain
welling up deep within my sternum
in the place where my heart should be
now a million pieces
broken, scattered. 

It pains to breath,
so shallowly and rasping
my chest flutters,
trying to avoid the
onset of hurt. 

One thought, one stab.
Two thoughts, two stabs.
No thoughts,
Numb. 

They never told me
that a breaking heart
would actually hurt.

Shared meal - Tongue Thai'd

Such a sassy lady

 "Does it have an eyeball?"

Flavours of the Asian Persuasion were the inspiration for our Wednesday night degustation. And so we car pooled our way to Henley Beach Road to get a little bit Tongue Thai'd.

We blew through the door in a flurry and were met with a cheerful "The kitchen has stayed open for you!" We sat and frantically scoured the menu. Minutes later, we were ordered, hungry and rearing to go.

Our fish cakes and tofu entrees arrived first and we were a little hesitant to begin. It all seemed a bit bland. Suddenly, the waiter arrived with our sauces and apologies and we devoured the entrees, glad we hadn't actually begun.

The rogue sauce

Under the watchful gaze of the Tongue Thai'd sassy lady we were delivered plate after plate of deliciousness. Our order included one red curry, one prawn curry, one basil beef..curry, and an enormous whole flounder fish...in curry. It was not long before my eyelids were sweating from the more than mild warmth eminating from our meal and I was asking more and more often to "please pass the rice".

My favourites were the red curry and the whole flounder, which arrived sans eyeball (I am slightly obsessed with cooked fish and their eyeball - not in a good way - they seem so alive still...). I ate, once again, until the point of pain and, even with our four reasonable appetites, we were unable to finish everything in front of us.

The decor within and the choice of music did not leave us at a loss for words. The rich red furniture and interesting artwork brought a warmth and coziness to the restaurant, while we danced and wiggled in our seats to Madonna and Michael Jackson.

Between the excellent food and the lovely atmosphere (and the lovely staff staying open for us arriving so late, and being kind enough not to explicitly shoo us out), this restaurant will definitely not leave you Tongue Thai'd.

Mind the pun.

Wine & Nibbles - Clever Little Tailor

 "I'm looking for my friends. Is there...more?"

It was already dark and I was walking down Hindley Street when I stumbled across Peel Street; a large, tinted windowed car pulled up just inside the street. Peering down, I could see few lights and wasn't comfortable heading down the eerie side street. Mustering courage, I set off and passed a shop front from which a gentleman emerged, locked the door and then walked away with his hands in his pockets, whistling in a sinister horror-movie way. I quickened my pace. Ahead, I saw lights and hurriedly headed towards them.

Clever Little Tailor, was I glad to see you.  I made my way inside and was greeted by the bar staff. I had a quick peek around for my friends and, not spotting them, I asked the bar staff if there was more to Clever Little Tailor out the back.

"No, what you see is it!"

Clever Little Tailor is tiny and scrumptious -  a delicious, perfectly formed canapé of a bar.

I simply marvelled at everything inside. The stone wall to my right. The music. The strange black room-sized box that we decided was the cool room. The tiny little capers on our plate of chatuterie. We ordered a wine each, a small plate of nibbles and settled back allowing the atmosphere envelope us.

While weekends are another story, on a weekday, this miniature bar is a perfect little hideaway from the world to gently catch up with friends.

Oh Clever Little Tailor, I just want to snorgle you.

Savers Expedition: Sunday, 23 June

 

I have failed to mention that I am an op shopper by trade.

It is a way of life.

I am not exclusively op shop, as I do allow myself the occasional brand new item, but I cannot remember the last time I bought something at full price and not on special, and therefore consider myself an exceptional bargain hunter.

Now that I have recovered from that massive oversight of my personality, I will tell you about my weekend adventures!

I have a favourite op shop. The first time I set foot inside, I stood gaping, wide eyed at the rows upon rows of clothes as far as my short-sighted eyes could see. I was overwhelmed and didn't know what to do or where to start and so I pinched myself, believing I had died and found myself in my perfect idea of heaven.

The op shop is Savers at Noarlunga. And yes, I regularly make the trek to fill up on Saver-y goodness with its deliciously categorised clothing (sleeveless, short sleeved, shirts, shorts, skirts, pants, jeans) and lovingly sorted by size. Delightful. With my mum in tow, we descended upon Savers with a fervour only true bargain hunters can muster. As she hadn't been before, I had a few words of advice before we got there:

1. Eat first. We need to keep our energy up. We are in it for the long haul and this cannot be done on an empty stomach. (My mum made some awesome poached eggs with salmon, hollandaise sauce and spinach on English Muffins to keep us energised.) 
2. Get a trolley. The little ones are easier to manuever.
3. Grab everything you even remotely like, throw it in your trolley and decide when you try it on. This is because there is seriously so much stock that you will probably not "go back" to an item you liked, so grab it now.

When it comes to op shopping, I have a bit of a method. I am very picky about what brands I buy - why buy a cheap item that you could get in the shop, new, for $5 or $10? Therefore, I stick to brands that are relatively expensive new. Occasionally, something will catch my eye that is cheap but I try to avoid it. This helps me cut out a lot of items, stops the rows and rows of clothes or shoes from being so daunting and I can move at quite a quick pace.

So, how did I go today? I had a couple of self-imposed rules today especially as I was with my mum and didn't want to be there for 4 hours (...which has happened...more than once...). The rules were:

• No pants
• No skirts
• No black/grey/beige

I looked in my wardrobe recently as I was sad and wanted to wear something colourful to make me feel happy and I found very little that was colourful which made me even sadder. I need some colour, I thought.

Here we go:

Mink Pink dress, $12.99
Note: has pockets!

Rockmans blue vest, $3.99

Unknown brand, tartan winter shift dress, $5.99
Note: has pockets!

Temt knitted top, $5.99
Note: This is a shitty brand, but I liked it so I succumbed.

Miss Shop top with bow detail, $5.99

Portmans black bolero, $9.99

Portmans orange top with bow detail, $4.99
Note: brand new with tags

Total: $49.95

Thank you, thank you. Bows to the rousing applause of her adoring fans.

Chocolate Waffles - The Chocolate Bean

I'm in love.

It was just a harmless crush, so what happened?

The chocolate waffles happened.

We had a dinner of cheap and cheerful dumplings at Dumplings R Us and, although filled to capacity with dumplingy goodness, we decided that our dessert stomach was not satiated and that it needed filling with chocolate: stat. Note: while the exact location of the human second stomach is greatly disputed, it is widely known that there is always room for dessert and the dessert stomach is, in fact, pie shaped.

After a few minutes of quiet discussion, we settled on The Chocolate Bean. To me, The Chocolate Bean is a pioneer; I have been frequenting since university and it is the big mamma to the juvenile dessert craze that is currently taking over Adelaide. I immediately make my way upstairs - which is admittedly less dimly and sensuously inviting than it used to be - and our group of four settle at a table.

The mousse is my usual fare - and one you must try. However, having had the mousse only a week before (Oh my, I am such a dessert slut), I reluctantly eyed the rest of the menu. I had watched my friend have a debaucherous meltdown over the waffles the previous week and decided that I needed to experience the pleasure myself. Our order came to 2 chocolate waffles, a chocolate sundae and a turkish delight martini.

Yes, I did run my fingers around my finished plate in an effort to lick up the remaining chocolate icecream and chocolate sauce without putting my tongue to the plate (I believe I showed extreme self control). Yes, I did drink the remaining chocolate sauce from my little pot. Yes, I did drink from my friend's chocolate sauce pot also. Yes, I did complain bitterly at not being able to mop up all my icecream, which in turn was met with a rather scathing "First world problems" from a gentleman on the neighbouring table.

Oh Chocolate Bean, you can fill up my dessert stomach any day.

Chermoula Lamb Burger - The Colonist

"Where shall we go for tea tonight?"

The call to action on a Wednesday night has been spoken. Every Wednesday, a group of fine, elite athletes descend upon Norwood to "punish some cock".

We play badminton and we play it professionally and seriously.

In truth, the badminton is largely a front for going out to a lovely dinner and allows us to feel less guilty as it is preceded by two hours of intense exercise.

This week we felt like a good ol' pub meal and moseyed our way down to The Colonist on The Parade. The pub feels like a toasty warm and comfortable, slightly run down log cabin with peeling paint and big sofas. The artwork provides a source of conversation and when it lulled, we would fall into a comfortable silence while surveying the room.

Even though I had a burger last week from the lovely Burgerstronomy, the Chermoula Lamb Burger was recommended and I simply couldn't look at anything else on the menu - I think after the workout I was in dire need of something big, meaty and carby. The Colonist Classic boasts a spiced lamb patty, with wild rocket, tasty cheese (and it was tasty!), grilled free range egg (of the deliciously runny variety), tomato, grilled smoked bacon (because everything requires bacon), tomato chutney and a side of chips.

I almost hoed into it before taking a picture, it looked so inviting to my ravenous badminton fueled hunger. It wasn't huge, thankfully - but just the perfect size for a filling meal and I had to push myself for the last couple of mouthfuls (which I tried not to eat but found missing from my plate, meaning I had absentmindedly finished it when I wasn't paying attention). I was initially disappointed by the number of chips in the little side bowl (chips are my kryptonite) but I couldn't have fit one more in if ninjas tried (this is a hilarious and unintended autocorrect that I am keeping).

The Colonist is consistent, reliable, stable.

Much like a comfortable pair of nanna knickers.

Peanut Chocolate Fondant - Onyx Dessert Bar

"Oh yes," she moaned, "oh yes," as she closed her eyes in ecstasy.

So, I went to a dessert bar on Sunday night with some friends and was thoroughly pleased.

On O'Connell Street in North Adelaide, Onyx greeted us with a broken door, a door that would only open a sliver and forced us to think thin thoughts as we squeezed our way inside - ironic thoughts to be having upon entering a dessert bar. Onyx takes itself much too seriously while trying to soften the blow by having fun and colourful decor. The juxtaposition of the service versus the furniture was confusing, and so we simply sat on our comically large round chaises with our chins almost on the slightly-too-tall tables perusing the menu on mini iPads while very formal waiters in black tie attire took our order.

I ordered the Peanut Chocolate Fondant and, after seeing the coffees ordered by my friends, hastily threw in a mocha (this turned out to be a mistake that I didn't discover until much later, approximately 2.04am as I lay wide eyed and staring at the ceiling). My dark chocolate mocha returned on a trendy and apparently difficult to carry slab of slate ("Is this real slate? Dishwashable, microwaveable, oven safe.. I think it's ceramic") with a teeny tiny little almond cake, sugar cube - cue equine jokes - and a strange silver stick masquerading as a spoon.

Enter the Peanut Chocolate Fondant. Placed jauntily off-centre and perfectly aligned with the circular pattern of the plate, it looked reasonably harmless and demure, kind of. Topped with peanut brittle and salted caramel ice cream, and surrounded by more salted peanuts, the Fondant was simply oozing with peanut chocolate sauce.

"Der ver zwei peanuts, valking down der strasse, and von vas . . . assaulted! peanut."

I finished it wild eyed, scared and shaking. "What have I done?" I cried, upset no one had saved me from myself, looking at the unfinished desserts around me and wishing I had the same level self control as I lifted my spoon and tried to scrape up the last little bit of melted-salted-caramel-icecream-chocolate-peanut-sauce without resorting to licking my plate.

I don't think I can go back any time soon, I probably can't fit through the door.

The Great Gatsby (Film) - Baz Lurhmann

"I've never seen such beautiful shirts before."

Having drunk an innordinate amount of tea before descending upon the cinema, I wasn't certain I would make it through all 142 minutes of The Great Gatsby. I did, however, as I was distracted and dazzled by the Baz-iness of it all.

I went in with low expections; from memory I had enjoyed the book (while studying it) and I enjoy Bazza's style, so I didn't want to get my hopes up. The Great Gatsby was a pleasant, flamboyant journey and Bazza did not disappoint on his usual ability to create a stunning spectacle.

And by pleasant, I don't mean pleasant in the sense that the story was jovial, but that it was visually appealing and the story line executed smoothly.

For those unfamiliar with the story of Gatsby, go read it. It is a wafer thin sliver of a book.
I'll wait for you.

Waits.

Welcome back. I studied this book in high school, which both ruined and enhanced it. I approached the film with themes in mind; money, material wealth, love, status, the colour green and its significance, The American Dream. Despite trying to take an intellectual approach, I was sidetracked by Bazza's volumptuous portrayal of the parties and I lusted after the ladies' dresses.

Admittedly, the movie slows down in the middle, but seeing as you have now read the book you will understand that there is a great deal of soul searching and reflection required when hosting ginormous parties. I enjoyed the acting; Leo was an excellent Gatsby (gosh, Leo is doing rather well for himself these days, isn't he?) and Daisy was played very well by Carey Mulligan but ultimately I felt very little towards her. I think you are meant to feel little sympathy for her, though, as she is a somewhat two-dimensional character.

Oh, and the executive producer was Jay-Z. 'Nuff said.

Bazza, you throw one hell of a party.

The Time Traveler's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger




"A big reckless novel...."

My eyes would travel to those words on the cover on the rare occasions I closed the book, the times when I absolutely had to get up and do something with my life other than follow Henry and Clare through the past and the future. I finished the 518 page novel in roughly 24 hours with little respite. Even when I wasn't reading it, it consumed my thoughts. Big and reckless it is. Oh, how it mercilessly toyed with my emotions.

"It will stay with you for some time. That fucking book ruined a whole day of my honeymoon," my best friend said in an effort to console me, "Do you have any hard liquor in the house?"

This is not a book to be taken lightly. You do not finish this book feeling elated and then move on with your life. You are depressed and saddened and filled with such longing that you lay awake at one in the morning still thinking about it.

This book cuts out your heart and hands it back to you on a plate.

But this is not a bad thing. The Time Traveler's Wife makes you feel. If you are empty, your heart will be kick started into action. If you are full, your emotions will create a meniscus on the surface of your experiences and spill down the sides. If you are in love, you will understand. If you have lost, you will understand. You will move through every emotion as you move back and forth in time with Henry.

At times, the story is wickedly funny. It is also very sexy. It explores themes of love and family, free will, choices, survival, time and knowledge - what would you do if you knew what was going to happen? The story can feel a little lurching at first until you fall into the rhythm of the non-linear, non-sequential and patternless moving backwards and forwards in time, so make sure you keep an eye on the dates and ages of our protagonists. And hold on tight.

Snuggle down with this book on a cold weekend when you won't be interrupted; on a weekend when no one will see your red rimmed eyes and simply be with Henry and Clare in their love.

Nice to meet you

Hi there!

Waves.

Lovely to meet you. I hope we can be friends.

Over the coming pages, I will review things I like. More thinkings, than reviews. I rarely experience anything that I cannot derive some positivity and joy from and therefore will endeavour to write in such a fashion that you are also compelled to try said experience.

The central topics for these pages are movies, books, live performance, food, bargains and misc. (pronounced "misk"). The thoughts within are for you to do with as you wish.You may or may not agree with me, but at the very least I hope you find it interesting.

Let us throw all logic and caution to the four winds and embark on our journey.